Five Ways to Deal with Anger in Children
Every adult gets angry sometimes. It’s a fact of life. Sometimes we’re just in a bad mood and something that’s not really a big deal sets us off. Other times, our anger is completely justifiable. Some of us have a short fuse, while others rarely lose their temper.
Children aren’t immune to anger, either. Anger is, after all, a completely natural emotion. Our job as parents is not to prevent our children from ever getting angry. In order to do that, we would have to cater to their every whim, and that would be doing them a disservice. Our job is to teach them how to properly manage their anger. Here are five ways we can do that.
1. Set a good example — When you find yourself getting angry, strive to handle your emotions in an appropriate manner. Yelling, screaming and getting violent aren’t things we want our children to do when they get mad, so it’s important that we don’t do them, either. Calm yourself down in a way that you would want your child to calm down when angry, and he will usually emulate your actions.
2. Talk to your child about his feelings – When you see that he is angry, ask him to explain why. Sometimes it might be such a silly reason that by the time he gets done explaining it, he will realize that there’s nothing to be angry about. If he does feel that he has a right to be angry, talking it out will help him calm down and find a solution to the problem.
3. Encourage your child to let his anger out in an acceptable manner – When we’re really mad, sometimes we just need to release some of that negative energy before we can move on. Your child could hit a pillow, run laps around the house, or pound on some Play Doh for a while.
4. For children who are old enough to write, a journal can be helpful — When they get mad, they can write about their feelings. Once they’re down on paper, it’s easier to work them out rationally and let them go.
5. Sing with your child — Singing might be the last thing he wants to do when he’s angry, but it can help diffuse the rage. Help him make up a song about being angry, and have him sing it when he’s upset. This provides an appropriate outlet for his feelings and lightens the mood a bit so that you can effectively work out the problem.
Seeing our children angry can be difficult. But it’s important not to give in just to calm them down. Teaching them how to deal with anger will serve them much better in the long run.
Additional Resources:
Better Behavior Wheel – An upbeat, fun, and totally unique approach to child behavior management.
Parenting An Only Child - The Joys And Challenges Of Raising Your One And Only: Looks at the advantages and disadvantages of the single-child family, and offers tips on raising an only child.
